by Celine Ruscher
I have lived with anxiety since childhood. I don’t count the sleepless nights, the lump in the throat, the weight on my stomach, and the constant ruminations on a specific topic. Ruminations and racing thoughts are the most challenging symptoms, as it is hard not to envision the multiple scenarios that can arise from a single situation. For instance, I am struggling with the uncertainties related to the future. I frequently try to solve these uncertainties by acting impulsively, such as for instance applying to every job opportunity that I can find. However, this problem-solving approach does not make the anxiety disappear; it makes it worse. To manage my anxiety, I am following Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), which has been specifically designed to help with anxiety. I have learnt to become more mindful of the present moment by doing short mindfulness exercises, and to give less weight to my fears about the future by journaling. I have tried to engage with activities that make me feel good, like walking or writing. I am trying to accept the unpleasant and uncomfortable feelings associated with anxiety. In addition, I work on being kinder to myself.
Sometimes the anxiety manifests in the form of panic attacks. The world is spinning around me, and I feel dizzy and believe I will faint. Panic attacks generally come out of the blue. At a crosswalk. While waiting for the Skytrain. During a meal. I noticed that they are associated with sensory-overwhelming environments or cognitive overload. If I successfully recognize the signs and tell myself, “This is a panic attack”, the intensity of symptoms decreases, and I can navigate the panic attack better. I also know that I must isolate myself from external stimuli by wearing noise-cancelling headphones, wearing sunglasses, or simply putting on my hood, as wearing a hoodie has become for me an efficient strategy to cope with overstimulation. I also always have water with me. Drinking cool water helps decrease the intensity of anxiety.
There are plenty of strategies that can be used to help with anxiety. It’s a trial-and-error process, and sometimes, some strategies work in a situation and not in another one. It is important to keep on trying to find techniques that connect to the present moment. Self-compassion also plays an important role, as it is not always easy to take care of anxiety, and it’s perfectly fine not to be successful when trying a strategy.
About Celine
Celine immigrated from France to Canada in 2021 and was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 2022. She is engaged in raising awareness around serious mental illness and suicide while still being in the early stages of her recovery journey. She works in the educational area (UBC, private company) where she aims to develop strategies to support students struggling with their mental health or being on the neurodiverse spectrum.
From January 2023 to June 2025, Celine was a Youth Educator for the Crisis Centre for which she delivered the workshop “Self-care for mental health.’’ She also took the North Shore Mental Health Peer Support Training (VCH) and graduated in January 2025. She is currently completing her practicum.
In order to offer you additional support, Pathways would like to hear from you. We’re offering a Q & A section for caregivers. If you have specific questions or inquiries about living with mental illness, please send them to familysupport@pathwayssmi.org and we will do our best to address them in a future Notepad newsletter.